Namaste, shalamah and shakattack. Clinton Baptiste is one of the country's pre-eminent mediums, clairvoyants and psychics. As he embarks on his latest tour, Roller Ghoster, Londonist talks to Clinton about cemeteries, celebrity ghosts and the Bakerloo line extension.
London is chocka with spirits. What's the most memorable encounter you've had here?
I once bumped into the ghost of Peter Stringfellow in St Martin's Lane. He told me he has his own Cabaret of (literally) Angels in the Celestial Realm nowadays. He doesn't let them sit on his lap anymore up there, cos the combined weight of him, them and his massive hair sees them falling through the clouds. He still looks good though. He can't beat them dead ladiez off with a dirty harp, that fella!
What's the best place to go ghost hunting in London?
I would say Highgate Cemetery. It has a few celebrity ghosts n' that up there. Not boring everyday folk. Gimme Karl Marx or George Michael any day. In fact I had a healthy debate with those two the other night around midnight among the gravestones. Marx is giving it "Freedom is Collective and Economic in Nature. In Bourgeois Concept, existence of an economic inequality as a hallmark of and a necessary consequence of freedom". George just said "I don't want your freedom." We fell about. He's funny like that, George — don't give a monkeys.
And what's your favourite of the Magnificent Seven cemeteries?
Without doubt it's Brompton. I have often had publicity photos shot there. Beautiful light, however you can often hear the wails of tormented souls in purgatory. Still, that could be The Shed at Chelsea FC which backs onto it.
Are you able to look into the future and tell us what the next big hipster London trend is?
Simple. It's a new thing where hipsters sport the merch from a top medium show in London. They don't even have to go to the show, as it goes. Just turn up and buy the merch. Grey, white or black T- shirts in all sizes. Er...and mugs. And programmes.
And can you tell us when the Bakerloo line extension is actually going to happen?
When hell freezes over, which is no time soon with global warming an' that.
Your central London shows are sold out. Why didn't you foresee this and book an extra night?
I normally consult my spiritual oracle at Phil McIntyre Entertainments about that sort of thing from his golden throne on Newman Street W1. Whatever he foresees in the corporeal world of Ticketmaster he advises me and then I act on it. Mind you, we will be doing an extension of the tour next year, so I strongly predict your readers will come to that instead, if they can't get tickets. But yes, my little padawan, that is a very good point the more I think about it. Why didn't I foresee it? Damn my third eye.
Clinton Baptiste appears in his new show Roller Ghoster at Leicester Square Theatre from 10-12 May 2024, although it's waiting list only. Tickets are still available for many other dates on the UK tour, including the Beck Theatre in Hayes (9 June) and Clapham Grand (6 November).
