Beware the pornographic perils of Bluetooth Chelsea Barracks sold for incredible £959 million - expect imminent Sloane explosion as 2000 luxury apartments move in Afghanistan soldiers' exhibition up for award at National Army Museum Home time warning - trains between London and Milton Keynes are suspended Happy birthday Thames Barrier, 25 today! Image courtesy of Simon Crubellier via the Londonist flickr group.......

London Ambulance Service is the best. And it has the best blogger, too. Just as well, because gun crime has risen 10%. Free wifi on London to Milton Keynes bus route. At last, a reason to go to the new town. Securitas robbers sported 'false noses, chins, moustaches, stubble and hairlines'. Putney's rear of the year fought off 'rear-ly tough competition' by showing off 'her best ass-et'. Image of Primrose Hill courtesy of ignacio......

Bugger the football, the only thing the music kids here at Londonist are bothered about at Wembley is when it will be ready for gigs. Bon Jovi, Take That, and Robbie Williams were all shunted off to Milton Keynes Bowl when the stadium failed to open in time for their planned concerts over the summer, but now another band are staking a claim that they will be the first people to play at Wembley......

As far as comebacks go All Saints making their mark back on the pop scene is our favourite. Yeah sure, we were there at Milton Keynes screaming along to Take That back in the summer, but when we're talking new material our favourite fighting girl group have taken the edge with Rocksteady. After our Lily Allen giveaway last month, our friends at 3FrontRoom have offered us tickets to their next special event, and yup......

A particularly silly article entitled Is London the New New York? Or Is It the Other Way Around? appeared recently in the New York Sun. The main arguments for the immediate twinning of our two cities put forward by the hackette what wrote said article seem to be: A) Paul McCartney, Gwyneth Paltrow and Madonna all own homes in both cities; B) sushi-lovers can choose to eat from at least two Nobu restaurants; C)......

With Download, The Isle Of White Festival and Bon Jovi's Milton Keynes shows all coming this weekend, festival season is well and truly upon us. For agrophobics everywhere else, may we suggest the following for consideration. Tonight: Upbeat, uncynical quirky Brit punky pure pop from Circuits upstairs at the Garage alongside Popular Workshop and LR Rockets. £5 in, doors at 8. Tuesday: From those nice folks who bring you Rock'n'Roll Soul and Health and......

Dear Sir, I wish to complain, in the strongest possible terms, about the amount of cockfun on general show in London. You recently highlighted a case, highly disturbing to my mind, of the Victorian pub windows etched with images of spasming cream cannons. Imagine my disgust, therefore, at encountering this foul window display in the Covent Garden area. I am highly concerned with the flagrant exhibition of stud undies, willy soap-dispensers and drinking bottles......

With news that Wembley's Take That concert has been moved to Milton Keynes Bowl, 90s pop fans across London must be feeling a bit grumpy. But have no fear, for tickets have today gone on sale for what sound like two of the most unnecessary come-backs going... First up, it's the street version of Take That, London's very own East 17. Clocking up twelve top ten hits including a Xmas number 1 between 1992......

It's not a great news Friday what with Wembley not being Wembley, tube lines closing and the fact that there's going to be a huge shortage of coke this weekend. So here's one to warm your wellies as you wait for the weekend to wash away your working worries. A Wycombe pensioner has been given a bus pass valid for 203 years. Sprightly seventy one year old Elizabeth Bateman's pass, issued as part of......

The money pit known as Wembley Stadium is now not due to open until 2007. Bon Jovi, Take That, Robbie Williams and the Rolling Stones have now been cast to the four winds - they'll probably relocate to Twickenham and erm Milton Keynes. Anyone who has tickets for those shows - your band and your stadium sucks. Little setbacks like blowing £757m on a glorified playground have not dampened our enthusiasm for the Olympics.......

Since the tube map of music failed to give Heavy Metal it's own line, even though we Brits practically invented the bloody thing, we thought we'd redress the balance by concentrating this week on a couple of shows that will echo as much to the sound of creaking limbs as they do to that of screaming electric guitars. First off there's that contentious additional Bon Jovi date at what will by then be the......

Now that the Pop Kid, the Noisy one and the Club Londonista have all had their say, it falls to Ricky to throw in his two cents. For want of a better pseudonym, let's call him RiotRicky. More appropriate job titles on a postcard please, along with your pick of last year's music. Top Ten Singles: Bloc Party - Pioneers Green Day - Holiday The Eels - Hey Man (Now You're Really Living) Weezer......

Every minute of receeding daylight heralds the approach of the end of the year list and the NME kicked things off in their paper issue today with their top 25 gigs of the year, as voted for by you, the reader. Well it says that but with categories of Most Pissed (The Duke Spirit in Cheltenham), and Best Costumes (Circulus at the Tapestry Festival which as far as we can tell had only the......

They may not have made it into Channel 4's greatest gigs of all time but for the 130 000 who made it, it was probably pretty damn close, for the rest of us there's this: Green Day - Bullet In A Bible (Live CD/DVD) (Reprise) With American Idiot, Green Day pulled off what will probably become known the most emphatic comeback in music history, probably even eclipsing that of Tony "Amarillo" Christie (sorry, Tony).......

Londonist is as addicted to buying DVDs as everyone else, so it made sense that we should start a regular column to highlight the little laser-etched treats coming your way over the next week or so. Let us know what you think in the comments. Well folks, it's getting to the time of year when the likes of Chegwin, Biggins and Daniels descend begrudgingly upon [enter the name of your hometown here] to switch......

So it was the week that the Crazy Frog beat Coldplay to the number one slot, and suddenly everyone cares about the singles chart again! Still at least Coldplay's X&Y was leaked on to file sharing networks (not free music sites as you might like to call them) before Froggy has even hit the studio, so kudos to the band there. Of course it will mean that EMI's share prices will fall through the......

Have we moaned about the transport system in London enough today? Maybe...but, hey, if the news is there we have to report it right? Today a new study by the RMT union has revealed just how much more expensive travel in London is compared to other European cities. The study compared combined rail and metro fares across different regions. Here's what it found: - An annual travelcard covering London's 15-mile radius costs £1,580. In......